Removing this 3 year old is devastating and wrong

welovegrayson | Wednesday, November 17th, 2010 | 4 Comments »
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Monday, November 15th, 2010
Published by Fathers and Families

F & F Member Eric Reines, M.D. Disagrees with Our Position on Wyrembek Adoption Case

As Fathers and Families has highlighted a number of the family law issues involved in the recent Vaughn-Wyrembek adoption dispute (both in blog posts on this site and on our official Facebook page), we are seeing a great deal of discussion on this topic. One voice that has risen out of this discussion is that of longtime Fathers and Families supporter Eric Reines, M.D., F.A.C.P.

Dr. Reines disagrees with much of what we have posted to date on the subject. His statement on the case is below:

Responsum in re Adoption of G.V., by Eric Reines, M.D., F.A.C.P.

Life is tough. But let it be tough on me, not on my child.

This is the nobility of spirit, the humanity, that I aspire to, and that I expect of Fathers and Families.

Removing a three-year old child from loving parents, the only parents the child has ever known, is devastating, and wrong.

Only the most extenuating circumstances justify such an action: If the child were in danger from the parents; if the parents had kidnapped the child….

But none of this is the child’s fault, and all of this should be obvious to any mature adult. The child must not suffer for it. But the adults must. The adults must work together to lawfully change bad laws. [continued at Fathers and Families]

4 Comments

  1. robin hood says:

    finally a man steps up. This man is a father and realizes that Grayson didn’t create this problem and had no way to avoid it. If we choose to have unprotected sex, let the man handle his mistake, not the child. If we choose to have sex with a married woman, let the man absorb the consequences of his decision. Yes, the woman is equally responsible and yes the biological father should have as much say as she, but “no” a three year old child should not write the emotional check or be the source of income for a biological father that wouldn’t pee in a cup at a court ordered mediation in order to visit with his child. He only contributed $25.00 in the first two years of the child’s life and is now sueing for $450,000.00? The State of Ohio assured the adoptive parents that the ‘legal parents’ right were surrendered and granted permission for the adoptive parents to leave the state?
    Let the biological father seek relief from the State of Ohio. Grayson, a 3 year old child, should not have to write the ‘emotional check’ for Ohio’s mistake. Is the State of Ohio going to sue too? Maybe everyone can figure out how to make money off of Grayson’s pain and suffering?
    Will the father get AFDC and food stamps? Will Grayson be paying the biological father’s rent? Will Grayson share his food stamps with the biological father? Is the biological faher employed yet or does he have his meal ticket?

  2. [...] Removing this 3 year old is devastating and wrongNovember 17, 2010 | 1:34 amThis is the nobility of spirit, the humanity, that I aspire to, and that I expect of Fathers and Families. Removing a three-year old child from loving parents, the only parents the child has ever known, is devastating, and wrong. [...]

  3. bluphyl says:

    It is unbelievable that the Ohio and Indiana Courts have ignored the rights and best interests of this child. Grayson has the right to stay in the family which raised and nurtured him since his birth. He should not be the sacrificial lamb in order to support biological fathers’ rights. This is not about the biological father, not about the birthmother, or the adoptive parents. This is about a 3 year old child who needs the courts to step up and guarantee his right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness and that is with the adoptive family…the Vaughn’s. If the laws are wrong then they need to be changed. It they are not the courts need to uphold them. This child should not pay the price for poorly written laws or incompetent judges.

  4. [...] supporter of Fathers and Families, Eric Reines M.D., F.A.C.P., made this point brilliantly in his article published earlier this week about Grayson, “Life is tough.  But let it be tough on me, not on my child. [...]